Kids, Grandpa Athelind is here to tell you: if you don’t expect metahumor from this era, you are in for a treat.
This is one of the Fractured Fairy Tales segments from Rocky & Bullwinkle, a show that ran on 50% metahumor, 50% terrible, terrible puns, and 50% sheer audacity, and do not quibble with my math.
In the main R&B segments, the protagonists would regularly argue with the narrator, insult the cheap animation, and refuse to say lines with some of the very worst puns.
It aired from 1959 to 1964 across a network hop and a title change, and I think it’s fair to describe it as a five-year shitpost.
the thought of aziraphale being in Crowley’s flat and seeing that fucking statue every single time he’s there. like hi crowley, oh there’s the statue of us fucking that you thought was subtle enough to be an intimidation tactic but is clearly just a product of your sexual frustration and 6000 years spent pining. lovely. shall we eat at the Ritz today?
What if it was a mutual purchase that they bought while drunk one time at an auction because they both thought it would be hilarious, and now a few hundred years later it’s still in Crowley’s flat because they have an unspoken competition over which of them will mention how awkward it is first
For anyone else who was initially confused like I was lol
• unemployed
• anxiety
• big issues w big pharma
• alien fucker
• everyone is constantly pleading w him to get some sleep
• doctors r begging him to go to a hospital
• alien possesses him & ends up actually improving his quality of life
• nothing in freezer but chicken nuggets
• knows security guard is just doing his job, understandable, have a nice day
• talks 2 self in inappropriate situations
I used to have geese so here’s a tip for everyone:
If a goose is attacking you, don’t run. No matter what, stand your ground. They can fly but when they’re mad, they don’t usually try to fly. Hold your hands in front of you, ready to grasp. When the goose gets close, grab it by the neck bit closest to the head and squeeze. Not tight enough to choke the goose, but tight enough so they can’t break free. You can hold them until they calm down or just do the next step right away. The next step is literally just to chuck them as far as possible and run for your life. It makes the goose know you’re in charge and you have a better chance of getting away. Trust me I’ve done this so many times that I’ve lost count
I can’t tell if this is a shitpost or actual advice. But I do know geese are the fucking worst.
wait do those tin can phones really work?? I thought this was all a myth.
I just looked up a video this is wild I’m making one tomorrow
in my high school Art 4 class while we were no doubt supposed to be getting ready for a Very important Art Show, two of my friends made one of these phones but instead of talking into it they would write messages and clip it to the string and slide it across the string to the other and when the art teacher asked why they said “we’re texting” and she could not BELIEVE it, this was the FUNNIEST thing she’d heard all year
so she got on her office phone and called the principal and said “two girls are texting in my classroom I need you to come take their phones and issue them detentions” and we all waited like assholes for him to show up and when he asked where they were she gestured at my friends “texting” on their tin can phone and my principal was already a pretty tired dude but that was the most exhausted I think he ever looked.
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