Ah, time for my one Pride joke: I was talking to a conservative the other day and they asked me “How come Pride has to be in the summer? It should be in September when the kids are back in school and don’t have to see it” but I pointed out it’s right there in the bible, Pride cometh before the Fall
The joke is that I would ever talk to a fucking conservative
So I can’t stop thinking about the falcs making a video after that press conference and it’s full of intentionally bad acting and starts with one of the falcs pretending to read and then doing that whole “Oh, i didn’t see you there” thing to the camera. He says something like “many people have been asking how Jack Zimmermann fits in the locker room, so we’ve decided to clear a few things up”
He’s holding a measuring tape
“It’s quite a large locker room. Here are a number of other things that fit in it”, and then its a whole series of shots from the same angle showing different things while snowy or someone gives a voice over:
“Zimmboni”, Jack’s standing there, waving awkwardly at the camera
“A zamboni”
“Zimmboni on a zamboni” (Jack, sitting on the zamboni, “how did you guys even get this in here”)
“Two cowboys” it’s Ransom and Holster in cowboy costumes
Ransom: this locker room is big enough for the two of us
Holster: *thumbs up*
“Lord Stanley’s cup”
“Lord Stanley’s ghost”, accompanying a shot of an apparently empty locker room
“At least three of Bitty’s homemade pies”
Jack, Bitty, and Tater are holding a pie each
Tater is rapidly eating his
Tater: “two and a half”
“three hundred pounds of potatoes”: Tater posing with a sack of potatoes
“three hundred kilos of potatoes”: Tater posing with several sacks of potatoes”
“three hundred tonnes-” “no.”
“All of these current, future, and honourary members of Samwell Men’s Hockey”
Ransom and Holster are still dressed as cowboys
Jack is looking adoringly at Bitty
Tater, the honourary member, is holding am empty pie dish and using Jack’s distraction to steal some of his
Now all the falcs are standing in front of the camera, and the introduction is, “but there are some things that don’t fit in the locker room” and they each take turns to list an item:
“The Titanic”
“A blue whale”
“The Clyde river”
“Three hundred tonnes of potatoes”
“you never know until you try-”
“No.”
“Zdeno Chara on stilts, unless you… sort of… tilt him sideways”
“Woodstock”
“A goose”
“Actually, I’m pretty sure we could get a goose in here”
“That’s what I thought, but George was adamant that we couldn’t”
“And bigotry”
And then it ends with a graphic of a giant X next to the word “bigotry”, and a giant tick next to the word “pie”
Just as the phrase “what the entire fuck” implies the existence of fractional fucks, the phrase “what the absolute fuck” implies the existence of both positive and negative fucks (or else there would be no need for an absolute value operation). Taken together with the phrase “what the actual fuck” (which implies the existence of imaginary fucks), we may thus conclude that fuckery is isomorphic with the complex field.
Technically, we can only conclude that “a fuck” is an element of some norm space over a field containing fractional values; the space being isomorphic to ℂ is a substantially stronger claim.
If anyone ever said “what the rational fuck” we would have a stronger basis for
ℂ, as that would imply some irrational fucks. We could then generously assume completeness and thus a Banach space that is at least a subset ofℂ. However, no mention has also been made of whether this is a bounded space (”what the finite fuck?” could be taken as implication of infinite fucks on at least some axis), so there are many unexplored areas of research in fuck-topology.
‘i have no more fucks to give’ suggests it is a finite space
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