philosopherking1887:

houseofglass:

wingedlioness:

sacrificethemtothesquid:

justheretobreakthings:

Most shows I’ve seen that mention fan fiction readers/writers portray them as kinda oddball super-geeks with no lives or social skills.

So I wanna take a moment to appreciate the fact that in Parks & Recreation, the character who writes fan fiction is the intelligent, successful, and good-looking primary love interest of the main character.

Also I want to read the full fic he wrote.

It’s only unrealistic because he said he finished it.

He’s obviously lying, so it’s very realistic.

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Here we have Terry from Brooklyn Nine Nine. He’s an Absolute Unit, father, police officer, black, intelligent, kind, a main character……and writes fanfiction from The Good Wife.

B99 – breaking stereotypes all over the place.

ETA: gifset not mine, I think it’s from @msjessicaday

Note that both shows are from the same creator. Who also writes Kant fanfiction and calls it “The Good Place.”

idiopathicsmile:

idiopathicsmile:

i just remembered this story my dad told me one time, about abraham lincoln

a guy challenged abe to a duel once. lincoln very much did not want to duel this cat.

so lincoln agreed, on the condition he got to choose the weapon. maybe that was how it generally went in 19th century dueling culture, i have no idea.

the guy said “sure”

lincoln said, “ok. broadswords.”

so that poor would-be opponent shows up on the day of the would-be duel, and abe is outside, doing, like, some quick sword warmups.

now, back in lincoln’s day, he was, as any american schoolchild can tell you, the tallest fucking dude on the entire fucking planet, so please try to even imagine the majestic reach of this stovepiped giant’s condor-like wingspan.

(wingspan plus broadsword.)

abe’s enemy takes one look at this, does some quick mental calculations on his own arm length (mortal, human), turns around and goes home.

the best part is that, as i remember it, lincoln of course had no fucking idea how to swordfight. it was the 1800s. we had guns. he’d just been, like, waving this giant sword around haphazardly, whacking at tree limbs, making his arms look as big as possible because he knew this joker could see him, and he knew that guy didn’t know that lincoln didn’t know what the hell to do with a broadsword.

anyway, i don’t actually know if that story is true or not but i really really hope it is. i would love to know that the president who defeated the confederacy was also fucking hilarious.

UPDATE: a very helpful anon just linked me to an actual account of the actual historical incident. i got a number of crucial details wrong, as it turns out.

PLOT TWIST: the real version is considerably funnier

sexydexynurse:

christopher-chowder-chow:

Okay but like

Everyone realizes that Shitty B. Knight was born, raised, and still lives in Massachusetts.

But I feel like not enough people realize this means there’s an enormous possibility that he has SUCH an accent.

I live in MA, born and raised, just like Shitty. All of us have the accent, even if only sometimes or a little.

Lardo is “L-AH-do”

Zimmerman is “Zimm-a-man”

Holster? “Holst-ah”

Kegster? “Kegstah”

We don’t have R’s here. They just don’t exist.

I will forever stand by the idea that Shitty B. Knight can’t pronounce R’s for the life of him.

Is this why he goes by B or Shitty? Is his real name Brrr? And the r’s arenjust silent?