This reminds me of a party I went to last year. I was standing with some friends, chatting, and someone said something that indirectly implied that sexism exists. Some trivial recounting of the basic facts of daily life for most women. Something so mild, so uncontroversial, so mundane that I don’t even remember what it was.
Suddenly, this man standing on the outskirts of our conversational circle piped up with “actually, I think men are more discriminated against than women these days.”
All conversation died.
I turned to look at him and he had this smug, insufferable grin on his face, relishing this moment, expecting us to waste our time and energy refuting this ridiculous thing he had just said.
The Devil’s Advocate was among us.
And, in my mind, I saw the next 15+ minutes playing out. The parade of facts and statistics in a vain attempt to defend ourselves, our gender, and to prove that misogyny is real. The glib, snide denials from some shithead who is getting off on our pain and frustration. The Gish Gallop of bullshit that would take a whole evening to properly dismantle. It was depressing and overwhelming. I hated it. I had to kill it before it began.
So I looked him dead in the eye and I said “OK,“ shrugged, and just walked away.
Nothing I have ever said to another human being has ever been so crushing. As I walked away, I watched the smug grin vanish and confusion and anxiety set in. The rest of the group turned their backs to him and carried on as if he had never spoken – as if he was invisible. He was still staring at me when I walked over to another friend and told her what he had said. I pointed him out for her and made direct eye contact with him while we both laughed.
tl;dr: Don’t feed the troll. Let it perish, cold and hungry, in the wasteland of your indifference. It is weak and you are strong. Live your best life.
Acephobia in the LGBT+ Community from the documentary (A)sexuality.
It is just…so fucking weird how threatened people feel when it comes to Asexuality. I still can’t wrap my mind around it.
I’m so happy this post is being reblogged by LBGT+ people who aren’t asexual. I keep on reading posts by non-ace LGBT+ people of support to the ace community, and of being stunned by this reaction by a movement which should know better than to judge. AND THAT MAKES THIS ACE SO FREAKING HAPPY. The woman in the first photo expresses my sentiment. I know I belong in the queer/LGBTQIA movement. I want to belong. But I just don’t know if I’m welcome. I’m so happy that there are so many people on Tumblr who do not fall into the catagory of outright refusal of asexuality.
I know not a lot of people understand asexuality. And I know there’s confusion about it, about our experiences, and about how we fit in the movement. But let’s talk about this. Let’s have this conversation.
I mostly don’t delve into the ace tags, but I hear there’s a lot of ace-hate that and I really don’t get it. I don’t understand how asexuality is threatening.
You know what I (as a queer ace-spectrum person) find most threatening? Getting unwanted sexual unwanted advances from both queer and straight people. I’ve gotten them from people of all spectrums and it always makes me profoundly uncomfortable, and often unsafe. It just boggles my mind how people are upset by the concept of asexuality. That’s like getting really mad at someone who isn’t hungry. What’s the point? Just shut up eat your own sandwich. (And stop chewing on me.)
Wow, the fuck the people in those images.
Nobody has the right to disrespect anybody else’s sense of self. It may not be for, you but that does not give you the right to be an asshole.
We really need to push more for LGBTQIA+ to be a standard,instead of just LGBT, especially considering that even the B and T are already invisible in much of the community.
Not supporting some of us = not supporting all of us.
Not supporting some of us = not supporting all of us.
It really, really does bear repeating.
I couldn’t be further from ace, but for serious.
If we’re not in this together, we’re not in this at all.
This makes me so angry. I have friends who are ace, and they are just as much a part of the queer community as I am.
We need to embrace asexuality and treat it with the respect that it deserves.
I heart the non-aces who reblog this so hard. ❤ Thank you friends.
The A in LGBTQIA+ stands for asexual, not ally! Allies are great but they’re not a part of the queer community, while aces are!
There are many identities on the ace spectrum that don’t equal zero sexual attraction! If you’re demisexual (like me), you only experience sexual attraction after having a strong emotional bond with someone. If you’re gray-asexual, you rarely ever experience sexual attraction.
You can be ace and LGBPQ! You can be ace and trans*! Being ace doesn’t just mean cis aroace!
There’s no such thing as a cishet ace. By being asexual your attraction to the opposite gender is inherently different from a cisgendered heteroromantic heterosexual’s attraction.
Finally, asexuality is absolutely real and valid. Being ace is not a mental disorder, and being ace doesn’t mean you just haven’t found the right guy/girl/nb pal. If you’re ace, you are so valid and I love you so much!
1. This movie is hilarious. I’m glad I didn’t see any of the trailers before watching it, because they’re both objectively terrible, and terribly inaccurate about the movie’s tone. The studio was clearly trying to market it as some kind of cynical grimdark thriller (and in the process just made it look overwrought and boring). But regardless of the movie they set out to make, the movie they have is a gleefully over-the-top action-comedy sprinkled with kinky undertones that the movie leans into a lot harder than you might expect from a PG-13 four-quadrant franchise installment.
Nothing about this movie is subtle, and that’s part of what makes it enjoyable. Tom Hardy does a full-on physical comedy routine interacting with a blob of CGI goo with teeth, and somehow makes it work. The symbiote itself is a constantly hungry insult comic with tentacles, and you get the sense that at least most of the people involved in this project (if not the studio marketing department) understand that this is supposed to be funny and weird and are just going for it. Scene that ends with Eddie climbing into a lobster tank? Went for it. Monster kiss? Went for it. Venom’s very serious and not at all suggestive tongue:
“It’s honestly kind of hard to understand how something this off-the-wall slithered out of the studio system and managed to be so very entertaining, but here we are.”
…
“It’s honestly kind of hard to understand how something this off-the-wall slithered out of the studio system and managed to be so very entertaining, but here we are.”
…
SLITHERED OUT OF THE STUDIO SYSTEM!
Seriously, it’s like someone said, let’s make a gay alien version of Splash.
There are at least two comments by Eddie about Venom being up his ass. The tentacle sex thing is basically canon. I’d seen a couple of comics to that effect before I saw the film but I was expecting it to be more subtext and less text.
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